Elementary students, my kids are older (13-17 years old).
Sunday, May 21, 2006
Pesadillas de la Escuela (School Nightmares)
5/18/06
I’m teaching English to 9th, 10th and 11th graders twice a week at the high school. This Tuesday was especially memorable….The class begins at 7:20am, by 7:30 their teacher, Orlando had arrived. The 24 9th graders arose from their desks greeting him as he came in to the room. Having missed last weeks class I asked him what was planned today and he said they were to take an “easy” exam. I then asked, “How long do they have to complete it?” Orlando responded, “Until they finish.” What? I asked myself. We could be here all day! Before he passed out the exam, I took a look at it. This is when I confirmed that Orlando really doesn’t know anything pertaining to the English language. The exam was full of errors! For example, “Whot’s your name”, “Hove you any sisters”, “He, Charles” (Hi, Charles), “Ello, Jhampiere” (Hello, Jean Piere), and the best was, “I hove not any whit wine”.
I’m not sure why Orlando was elected as the English teacher this year. I’ve been teaching with him since the beginning of April and he has not once tried to speak a sentence of English with me. I’m sure that he didn’t request to teach English, it’s more likely he was appointed by the school principal. Knowing this frustrates me, because some of the other teachers actually try to speak English to me and have a better understanding of grammar.
So, part of me wanted to laugh and the other part of me felt for the students and how much more confused they soon would be after reading the exam. Nevertheless, Orlando handed out the exam, and I watched in terror. What was I suppose to do?! He had made 24 photocopies of the exam which in it self is not a simple task (it included traveling 3 hours to Otuzco and 3 hours back). And I didn’t want to undermine his intelligence in front of the students, so I decided to meet with him after school to go over the results and fix the errors.
The test included three sections, translation of common Spanish questions into English, a section of matching and translation of English vocab into Spanish. It should have realistically taken 20-25 minutes to complete. I finished it in 5 minutes. As the students quieted down and began working, we approached 8am. Elementary school begins 40 minutes after high school, at 8am respectively. I usually have quite an audience of elementary students that gather at our classroom windows, and doorway. Most of them know me, and get excited to see me in their school. As it is still some what of an anomaly to witness me teaching another language, that many have never heard.
I’m used to the crowd gathering, usually it’s not a problem, I leave the room and tell them to go to class. But, since my students were taking a test I was especially annoyed with the noise coming from outside. I stepped out of the classroom a couple of times to scold the kids who were yelling my name, “Mateo!” through the windows and door. Since Orlando didn’t give them a specific end time, the clock clicked away and I became more and more frustrated. Orlando got up and left the room. One student turned to another, obviously cheating and I called him out. He looked embarrassed but don’t worry… it gets worse. Some students turned in their tests. Those finished began talking about the answers. We were coming upon 40 minutes since the exam was handed out. More elementary students gathered by the windows, I shooed them away. A girl asked her neighbor for help, and I walked up to her, asking “Would you like help?” “I’m sure I know a lot more English than your neighbor!” Although, it was a sarcastic joke to keep her from cheating I felt bad for humiliating her in front of everyone. Orlando came back, after a 5 minute sabbatical. I was about ready to collect the tests from each of the remaining students but I watched Orlando and he seemed to be fine with the current state of disorder. When 45 minutes had passed I asked him if we should just take the tests from them and he said, “No, let them continue.” I almost walked home.
I was just about ready to flip out, when a girl sitting next to the window, who was still taking her test, (mind you) began asking a younger elementary student standing outside to help her; she took out her notebook and began reciting to the older student! Do they have no shame? I motioned to Orlando and he went over to the students’ desk. Finally, he does his job, I’m thinking to myself. I collected the remaining tests and even though some were not done, there was no way they would ever finish, given the noise in the room.
I began lecture, with only 30 minutes left of class. Orlando wanted me to teach them how to write birthday invitations and thank you notes, but I refused to teach that, knowing that they couldn’t even write the date in English. Baby steps….Before I started, I asked if there were any questions about the exam. They sat in silence. “So you knew every answer, and you all got a 100?” Still silence. We stared at each other, and I went ahead answering some of the harder questions on the exam. I taught them the months of the year, how to write the date, and gave them homework. And we finished with a song, “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star”. Yes, I sang it for them, even though I was in a horrible mood.
Later that day, after school, Orlando and I met up. I explained to him that there were many errors in the test and next time he should have me proof read a document before he makes photocopies. He said the person that typed the exam made the errors, not him. BULLSH*T! As if I was going to believe that. I wasn’t surprised that more than 75% of our students failed the test. I Guess we’ll be reviewing all that material again. Next time, I’m writing the test.
This is my life as an English teacher in Perú. Uneducated teachers, cheating students, non-conducive learning environments, non-existent parents, unmotivated students and teachers, the list goes on and on. A study by US News and World Report ranked education systems in developing countries. They found based on a countries GNP (Gross National Product) and other factors, Haiti had the worst education system, Perú was #2.
I recently bought a toilet seat for our latrine; I installed it and hung up signs inside the latrine wall, teaching the men how to lift up the seat when they pee. (Toilet seats are a rare find here, most people sit right on the ceramic or hover). It decided it was time for us to live in luxury. haha. Anyway, I was talking with one of the female teachers who lives with us about peeing on the seat. She told me that she heard you can get pregnant from a toilet seat. I laughed and than realized she was dead serious. I asked, “You think you can get pregnant from urine?!” And she said, “No, from semen on the seat.” I explained that would be very unlikely, but she wasn’t convinced, as she was sure it had happened before. This mentality I may expect from a student, but from a teacher? Especially someone who is a mother of three children! ¡Viva Perú!
I’m teaching English to 9th, 10th and 11th graders twice a week at the high school. This Tuesday was especially memorable….The class begins at 7:20am, by 7:30 their teacher, Orlando had arrived. The 24 9th graders arose from their desks greeting him as he came in to the room. Having missed last weeks class I asked him what was planned today and he said they were to take an “easy” exam. I then asked, “How long do they have to complete it?” Orlando responded, “Until they finish.” What? I asked myself. We could be here all day! Before he passed out the exam, I took a look at it. This is when I confirmed that Orlando really doesn’t know anything pertaining to the English language. The exam was full of errors! For example, “Whot’s your name”, “Hove you any sisters”, “He, Charles” (Hi, Charles), “Ello, Jhampiere” (Hello, Jean Piere), and the best was, “I hove not any whit wine”.
I’m not sure why Orlando was elected as the English teacher this year. I’ve been teaching with him since the beginning of April and he has not once tried to speak a sentence of English with me. I’m sure that he didn’t request to teach English, it’s more likely he was appointed by the school principal. Knowing this frustrates me, because some of the other teachers actually try to speak English to me and have a better understanding of grammar.
So, part of me wanted to laugh and the other part of me felt for the students and how much more confused they soon would be after reading the exam. Nevertheless, Orlando handed out the exam, and I watched in terror. What was I suppose to do?! He had made 24 photocopies of the exam which in it self is not a simple task (it included traveling 3 hours to Otuzco and 3 hours back). And I didn’t want to undermine his intelligence in front of the students, so I decided to meet with him after school to go over the results and fix the errors.
The test included three sections, translation of common Spanish questions into English, a section of matching and translation of English vocab into Spanish. It should have realistically taken 20-25 minutes to complete. I finished it in 5 minutes. As the students quieted down and began working, we approached 8am. Elementary school begins 40 minutes after high school, at 8am respectively. I usually have quite an audience of elementary students that gather at our classroom windows, and doorway. Most of them know me, and get excited to see me in their school. As it is still some what of an anomaly to witness me teaching another language, that many have never heard.
I’m used to the crowd gathering, usually it’s not a problem, I leave the room and tell them to go to class. But, since my students were taking a test I was especially annoyed with the noise coming from outside. I stepped out of the classroom a couple of times to scold the kids who were yelling my name, “Mateo!” through the windows and door. Since Orlando didn’t give them a specific end time, the clock clicked away and I became more and more frustrated. Orlando got up and left the room. One student turned to another, obviously cheating and I called him out. He looked embarrassed but don’t worry… it gets worse. Some students turned in their tests. Those finished began talking about the answers. We were coming upon 40 minutes since the exam was handed out. More elementary students gathered by the windows, I shooed them away. A girl asked her neighbor for help, and I walked up to her, asking “Would you like help?” “I’m sure I know a lot more English than your neighbor!” Although, it was a sarcastic joke to keep her from cheating I felt bad for humiliating her in front of everyone. Orlando came back, after a 5 minute sabbatical. I was about ready to collect the tests from each of the remaining students but I watched Orlando and he seemed to be fine with the current state of disorder. When 45 minutes had passed I asked him if we should just take the tests from them and he said, “No, let them continue.” I almost walked home.
I was just about ready to flip out, when a girl sitting next to the window, who was still taking her test, (mind you) began asking a younger elementary student standing outside to help her; she took out her notebook and began reciting to the older student! Do they have no shame? I motioned to Orlando and he went over to the students’ desk. Finally, he does his job, I’m thinking to myself. I collected the remaining tests and even though some were not done, there was no way they would ever finish, given the noise in the room.
I began lecture, with only 30 minutes left of class. Orlando wanted me to teach them how to write birthday invitations and thank you notes, but I refused to teach that, knowing that they couldn’t even write the date in English. Baby steps….Before I started, I asked if there were any questions about the exam. They sat in silence. “So you knew every answer, and you all got a 100?” Still silence. We stared at each other, and I went ahead answering some of the harder questions on the exam. I taught them the months of the year, how to write the date, and gave them homework. And we finished with a song, “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star”. Yes, I sang it for them, even though I was in a horrible mood.
Later that day, after school, Orlando and I met up. I explained to him that there were many errors in the test and next time he should have me proof read a document before he makes photocopies. He said the person that typed the exam made the errors, not him. BULLSH*T! As if I was going to believe that. I wasn’t surprised that more than 75% of our students failed the test. I Guess we’ll be reviewing all that material again. Next time, I’m writing the test.
This is my life as an English teacher in Perú. Uneducated teachers, cheating students, non-conducive learning environments, non-existent parents, unmotivated students and teachers, the list goes on and on. A study by US News and World Report ranked education systems in developing countries. They found based on a countries GNP (Gross National Product) and other factors, Haiti had the worst education system, Perú was #2.
I recently bought a toilet seat for our latrine; I installed it and hung up signs inside the latrine wall, teaching the men how to lift up the seat when they pee. (Toilet seats are a rare find here, most people sit right on the ceramic or hover). It decided it was time for us to live in luxury. haha. Anyway, I was talking with one of the female teachers who lives with us about peeing on the seat. She told me that she heard you can get pregnant from a toilet seat. I laughed and than realized she was dead serious. I asked, “You think you can get pregnant from urine?!” And she said, “No, from semen on the seat.” I explained that would be very unlikely, but she wasn’t convinced, as she was sure it had happened before. This mentality I may expect from a student, but from a teacher? Especially someone who is a mother of three children! ¡Viva Perú!
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